Israel: Hey Joe, just letting you know Hamas has retaliated to our decades long Occupation and repression and have broken through the prison gates and attacked Israelis. Go figure.

US.: Heres your chance. Its going to be a tough media manipulation, but well do our best. Good luck.

Israel: Were going to bomb the shit out of Gaza from top to bottom.

U.S.: Okay well reward you from start to finish with ammunition, money, vocal support and all the aid you need.

Israel: Were going to target civilians and say Hamas is hiding behind them.

U.S.: Okay well repeat that Hamas is a terrorist organisation even though democratically elected by Gazans.

Israel: Were going to halt all aid for the Palestinians weve already terrorised.

U.S.: Okay well repeat the lies about UNWRA.

Israel: Weve already murdered over 34,000 people but can you keep the world off our backs so we can complete our objectives?

U.S.: Okay, but you owe us, Bibi.

Israel: Can you stop them calling it a genocide, cos it makes us look bad. You knowhistory and all that.

U.S.: Well do our best, but theyre already calling me Genocide Joe because of U.S. unyielding support. Its a tough spin.

Israel: Were going to let thousands of children die of starvation.

U.S: Okay well lament the difficulty of aid trucks getting through so you dont look so heartless and cruel.

Israel: Can you send more weapons please?

U.S.: Okay. Hows thiswe sent bombs and food on the same day! Bombing and feeding the Palestinians in one shipment. Crazy huh?

Israel: Were going to let babies be taken from dead womens wombs and children have amputations without anaesthetic while entire families are obliterated with our bombing campaign.

U.S.: Okay, I guess there must be thousands of orphans by now? Oh well.thats war.

Israel: Were going to try to eradicate all Palestinians from both Gaza and the West Bank, but we need your continued help as we destabilise the entire region (world?) once we achieve our final aim.

U.S.: Done.

Israel: By the way, were going to the Olympics because our youth love sport.

U.S.: Good luck, hope some of team Israel achieve gold.

Russia: Were going to invade Ukraine.

US.: Were going to sanction you, demonise you in the media, freeze Russian assets, halt all trade and get a message to Zelensky that he is not to accept any peace deal from Putin. Weve got the Military Industrial Complex to support and this war is making us a motza.